Aunty Holly assesses her exercise regime equipment provided by Staff, finding it somewhat lacking.  

^{Portly: Adjective. Round. As applying to Feline, to be sufficiently (over)fed as to be rotund. Large. Not without girth.}

^{Mindful of recent comments of my growing stature, Staff have regrettably decided to supplement my diet with low fat dry food, and encouraged Me to lose a few extra pounds off My purrfect thighs.}

^{Despite explaining at some length that My ever so slightly rotund figure was largely due to an abundant display of winter fur, My Staff have purrsistently argued that an exercise schedule is in order.}

^{How purrfectly horrid! Chasing small coloured objects is meant to be a game, not a regime of torture! I refused to engage in such regimented behaviour. But wait there's more! Balls of wool, lengths of lace, bundles of cottons, all thrown across the room. What a mess! Then, to top it all off, I had large round rope objects thrown across the room at Me as well.}

^{In all of My nine lives, I cannot comprehend why any self respecting Feline would chase a 'quoit' thrown across the room as if it were cast out for collection by a Canine. Have Staff heard Me howling at the moon lately? Do I appear barking mad? No! I will have none of it!}

^{I have only one sport, that ancient and noble purrsuit, hunting. I will happily purrsue small lizards, juicy objectionable bird life and small, succulent Vermin. If, in the purrsuit of such, I offend the sensibilities of sensitive Householders, so be it.}

^{They are, of course, encouraged to join Me on My upcoming Feral Rat challenge, but until then, I will suggest They keep fit chasing their own health routines and leave the more discerning Felines amongst us, to admire My commanding figure.}

^{Purrfectly yours,}

^{Aunty Holly}

^{Carnival of the Cats #131 is creating havoc this week at the House of Chaos!}

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